Theresa and Jeremy

23 07 2007

Theresa and Jeremy

i don’t know where else to put this
i need to say how sad i am to have lost two of my best friends in the world
theresa killed herself on july 10
just three blocks away from where we are staying in the east village
jeremy is missing
he was last seen walking into the ocean at rockaway beach on july 18

i have known theresa for 13 years
she was like an older sister to me
i was there the night she met jeremy
who became like an older brother to me

if you’ve read theresa’s blog ‘the wit of the staircase’
you’ll know how erudite, witty and gorgeous her writing and thinking were
well, so too was she as a person
hyper-intelligent, hyper-beautiful, hyper-ambitious
not to mention generous and loyal: fiercely loyal

but she scared the hell out of some people with her sharp tongued rapier wit
i’ve seen so many people turn on her
i’ve seen so many people afraid of her
and i’ve seen how they harrassed her
literally to death

you people should be ashamed of yourselves
theresa had no power
she just wanted her art to be in the world
that’s all

beyond their friendship and artistic mentorship
i was so so proud and honored to have been able to work with them
theresa did my liner notes and jeremy did my album cover art
theresa’s words are so evocative and accurate and personal and witty
a perfect summary and introduction to the music
(you see, theresa is really sable starr.
now you know.)
and jeremy’s cover is so striking and gorgeous and perfect
70s filtered through the 80s
the sexxy babysitter in a day glo future retro disco daydream
and its kind of her too

(i’m not going to link to anything, you can google whatever, its everywhere…
this is just me needing desperately to put my version and anguish somewhere)

Theresa + Blake

god damn you pop music
i can’t believe that song came over the PA last night
so ghastly as to be comic
i swear it was hot chocolate’s 70’s FM ballad “emma”
“’twas a cold and dark December night/When I opened up the bedroom door/ To find her lying still and cold Upon the bed/A love letter lying on the bedroom floor/it read: “darling i love you, but i just can’t go on livin’ on dreams no more/i tried so very hard not to leave you alone/i just can’t keep trying no more”…’

theresa adored pop music and irony
she would have found that amusing
so i’ll let myself laugh

as for jeremy
i refuse to believe he’s not coming back
so i’ll hold out hope
because i also can’t believe that band played that pixies song last night
that can’t be a coincidence:
“cease to resist/given my goodbyes/drive my car/into the ocean/
you think i’m dead/but i’ll sail away…”

jeremy adored pop music and irony
he would/will find that amusing
so i’ll let myself laugh

here come those santa ana winds again…

RIP Theresa Duncan 1966-2007
jeremy, please call me back…

i love you both
xx blake

Theresa Duncan

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12 responses

23 07 2007
Gordon Lamb

I am so, so sorry you are going through this. Your pain can’t even be quantified.
My heart goes out to you.

23 07 2007
Baron von Luxxury

Hey Gordon –

Thank you for your kind words. I want Theresa and Jeremy to be remembered fondly and fairly. They deserve better than what they got.

Have a nice week and please hug your loved ones extra long…

– B

23 07 2007
Alison Tuck

My heartfelt sympathy to you for your loss. And a heavy heart takes me to sleep tonight as well, I will miss Theresa’s blog sorely, I’d come to rely on it for many reasons. Be strong and keep doing what you do.

Alison x

24 07 2007
Chris Walker Versus

Damn, dude.

I know you’ve got your friends and family and support system but if you ever need anything don’t hesitate to ask. I hope your friend Jeremy comes back.

Take care of yourself.

24 07 2007
Baron von Luxxury

Alison – thank you so much for your kind words, I also saw what you wrote on your blog and replied in more detail there. It’s nice to know she connected with you, that’s the important thing after all.

Chris – I agree, I hope so too, I’m still sad/mad. They are the same right now. Thank you for offering to help. All I can say is read what TD wrote and look at what JB did and include their ideas in the fabric of your work. That’s the most fitting tribute there can be.

(I’m remembering now that it was Theresa who first taught me what a “meme” was, years before I heard it used daily on the Web…dammit TD, you really did want to live on in this capacity, didn’t you?)

2 09 2007
The Duncan-Blake Effect In The Blogosphere, Part 4 « Seven Kinds of Denial

[…] San Francisco DJ Blake Robin, also known as Baron von Luxxury, posted a wrenching personal testimoni…His images show Duncan and Blake in a larkish mood, on a tour of a vineyard, and it is one of a very few of the Internet images associated with the suicide event that shows Theresa Duncan smiling. […]

2 09 2007
The Duncan-Blake Effect In The Blogosphere, Conclusion « Seven Kinds of Denial

[…] San Francisco DJ Blake Robin, also known as Baron von Luxxury, posted a wrenching personal testimoni…His images show Duncan and Blake in a larkish mood, on a tour of a vineyard, and it is one of a very few of the Internet images associated with the suicide event that shows Theresa Duncan smiling. […]

22 12 2007
Disco Workout

[…] Theresa and Jeremy was shocking and horrible. Theresa loved Steely Dan. I played their entire catalog plus this Blonde […]

24 12 2007
George

just saw this now, so it’s a bit of a late reply, but i dunno, just felt a bit emotional after reading this, cos my friend commited suicide about 2 weeks after this, she was missing for a week, ha! and the day they found her washed up my boyfriend broke up with me, god, just remembering now how fukd up that time was, there was a lot of other mental shit too, really all happens at once, eh?

25 12 2007
Baron von Luxxury

George, thats really horrible – I am sorry to hear. I am still processing what happened to my friends and think will probably need forever to do so. There’s no answers, only questions. We obviously can’t ever understand the agony our friends must have felt, but at the same time I can’t endorse it either. Giving up is definitely the wrong solution.

6 07 2008
The (Disco) Workout » Disco Sunday #37: Electro for Bummed Out Robots

[…] There’s an article on suicide in the New York Times magazine today, please read it. And I lost two incredibly important friends a year ago this week. So listen to the music but don’t fucking kill […]

4 07 2010
ConspiracyWit

Hey sorry to hear about your loss. I just came across this poem now. If you feel like checking it out, or sharing your poem, you are welcome to visit or join the golden suicides on ning network.

http://thegoldensuicides.ning.com/

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